My friend, Pastor Joby Martin, has a new book out about manhood. In a world where young men are in crisis, and where there are a lot of sources of really bad counsel for young men, I am thankful for Joby’s biblical treatment of the topic.

To give you a feel for the book, here are 20 quotes from the book as part of my “20 Truths” series. Be sure to order the book here.

20 Truths From ‘Stand Firm and Act Like Men: Becoming the Man You Were Created to Be Instead of Who the World Says You Are’

“The Bible is very clear about what it means to stand up and act like men, and what it takes for a man to become a man. Bottom line: Manhood is bestowed. It is passed down. From man to boy. (Mommas, if you’re reading this, hold on. I have some good news to say to you. Just hang in there and keep reading.).” (5)

“We as men have not only dropped the ball, we’ve exited the arena.” (6)

“In our culture, how do we know when a boy becomes a man? Obamacare says 26. Budweiser says 21. United States Army says 18. Xbox says 17. (By the way, there is no such thing as a mature video game. Just jot that down.) DMV says 16. Disney says 10. They charge you adult prices at 10 years old. The only place I can find any consistency is both Delta Air Lines and Advil. They agree, at 2 years old, you’re an adult.” (8)

“There’s nothing more dangerous in this world than an insecure, ungrounded man. It’s what gangs are full of. It’s why casinos grow larger and larger. It’s why bars are open late. And think about this — almost every single nonprofit that has ever been started could be traced back to the fact that men did not do what God has called men to do.” (10)

“In the same way, manhood is bestowed by God when we bow before him. In worship, service, and total surrender … The litmus test for manhood is this — do we imitate Christ? Do we lay down our life for those we love?” (12)

“If you’re a male made in God’s image, then He gave you manhood for His Glory and for the provision and protection of everybody He put around you. This may be news to some of you, but ultimately, being a man is a selfless calling.” (14)

“First thing that God gave Adam, the very first man, is work to enjoy. This is before the Fall. Adam has yet to sin, so work is not a result of sin. Not a punishment. I want you to see this — before there was sin, there was work. Why am I hammering this point? Because, man, you were created to work.” (28)

“Also notice that the Bible says that the man is to leave his family and cleave unto his wife. In other words, when you get married, that is your new family. Your family of origin, your mom and dad and siblings, become your extended family. And your new family is the family of a husband and a wife. And if God decides to bless you with children, then you will be adding to your new family, not starting one.” (37)

“The primary lie the enemy wants you to believe is that God is not for you. Ultimately, he wants you to think that God is not a good Father, and He does not love you, and that you would make a better god than He would. The enemy wants you to believe what you’ve suspected all along — you’re alone, God doesn’t care, and if your life is going to go your way, you better take matters into your own hands. Which is a lie from the pit of hell.” (38)

“The number one problem in all of manhood. Passivity. The reason we got to where we are is not because the man actively did something wrong. It’s not because he stormed the wrong castle. It’s because he didn’t do anything at all.” (39)

“Men, to stand up and act like a man, you must first bow down and surrender to Jesus. That’s where it starts. Recognizing that we have all sinned against a Holy God and there is nothing we can do to get us back to Him. The only way we make it back to the Father is through the Grace of Jesus’s blood poured out for us.” (47)

“One of the key ways to fight pride in your life is to worship. Find a gospel-centered church, sit under the teaching of the Word of God, and when you come before the Lord, don’t pretend it’s Christian karaoke. It’s not. In my church, we sing our faces off. Hands up. Top of our lungs. Why? Because we can. Because the God of the universe actually took the time to think us up.” (65)

“Humility is not a feeling. Humility is a posture. A response to God. A response born out of knowing who He is and who we are in light of Him. Humility is like exercise; it’s a thing we do. An action. We posture ourselves before the Lord and bow. Knee to the dirt. Face to the carpet. And when we do, the Bible tells us that He will lift us up, exalt us, in His time.” (67)

“Let me let you in on a secret. There is a part of the American dream that is 100 percent at odds with the message of the gospel. The pursuit of comfort. Nowhere in scripture does it say to pursue it or that God owes it to you. If you wanna pursue a comfortable life, then do not follow Jesus. Just don’t.” (72)

“Men are expert isolationists. You know why? Because we think, I got this…You were created in the image of God, and God said it is not good that man be alone.” (76)

“The rebellious person gives in to the temptation of the forbidden fruit, follows their own desires, and ends up, despite some fun along the way, being devoured. Lion food, which just becomes lion poop. The religious person gives in to the temptation of the fig leaf, thinking that by the works of their own hands they can cover over their sin and shame and therefore don’t need God. They follow their own rules and they end up, despite great effort, being devoured. Also lion food and lion poop.” (83)

“But the gospel-centered person follows Christ. Regardless of what you’ve done, regardless of your past, regardless of what has been taken from you, regardless of how many times the enemy has defeated you, if you are in Christ, then you are fighting from victory and not for victory.” (83)

“Here’s the reality of the world in which we find ourselves — the opposite of faith is not doubt, the opposite of faith is fear. Fear paralyzes and faith moves to action. To take up the shield of faith means that you take action in your family, in your church, in your community.” (109)

“Being a man means you leverage that authority to endure pain on behalf of others. Proverbs 24:16 says, The righteous man falls down seven times and rises again. Perseverance is not a value in our current culture. Very few people keep doing the same thing over and over in our culture.” (133)

“To be strong is not necessarily to be tough. It’s to be tender for and with the people that God has placed in your life. It is to make yourself vulnerable. It is to expose yourself to great pain and great discomfort for the benefit of the ones whom God has placed in your life. That’s what it means to be a man.” (134)

“You and I are not primarily tools in the hand of God to be used or even soldiers in His army to fight; we are primarily sons in God’s family to be loved.” (184)

This blog post and other writings by Ed Stetzer can be found on Church Leaders.